Post by mark on Jun 2, 2013 15:28:00 GMT -5
Hi guys...
I'll try to be as raw and candid as I can possibly be here. This game has probably been one of my most memorable and challenge games, and I was pleasantly surprised by that. Not because I didn't think this series or Justin was capable of a really good game...it's because I have never ventured out into games where I wasn't recruited or didn't know the host in some capacity.
There were extreme highs and lows throughout this game, so I will remember it fondly and the people I met for years to come. Ironically enough, the lowest of the lows have come during this jury process when I should be proud of my accomplishments and excited. I suppose I am. But I feel I am more humiliated than anything and remembering why I have attempted to "retire" many times and haven't played in two years. Is my pride hurt? Sure. But not because I don't feel like I've received the accolades I deserved. Not because Liam thinks I've basically given this game away. Not because it's never been said, this is Mark's game to lose.
No. I see the raw emotions elicited from this game.
I came into this jury phase prepared to be as respectful, non-aggressive, and as humble as possible. Though, I don't know how humble one can be when their main goal is to say, "Look how great I was in this game!" On the same token, I remembered that those who don't come in fighting for there game aren't really respected in the end, so I realized very quickly I needed to switch gears.
I think what hurt me the most is I came in respecting my allies only to have been passive aggressively insulted on a number of cases, masked in eloquent speech and an upright manner, starting before the game when my torch walk was called into question. Really? Anybody who knows me, knows that the torch walk is my favorite, most respected part of the game, so I take pains to pay tribute, and to pay tribute honestly. But it was cried BS. And then I felt very reduced from a peer, from a mutual ally, to a puppy dog who's sole purpose in this game was to make my closest ally my object of strategic affection.
If I'm to be honest, I've never played a game with an ally so like minded to myself, so yes, it was refreshing and respect-worthy. But I feel I have been reduced over and over again, even to the point that when I did start defending my game, that I was accused of nastiness and mudslinging. The worst part is that I feel that many of you have been treated the same way. It hurts.
I don't have anything more to say about my game that hasn't been hashed out over and over again. I would like to have met more of you, but our schedules were different. Whereas I was on all day during the afternoon, most of you guys were on at night, so when we did cross paths, we only had but a few moments to skip pleasantries and dive into strategy. I didn't have the luxury of time. But I did have the luxury of my skills to get me here. I don't believe I promised any of you anything. Even you, Ben. We created a wonderful bond that have all the intentions of the world in maintaining, but I know we talked about not ever being able to be on the same page. So our voting for each other over and over again was inevitable.
Bree and Starr, you guys were such a pleasant surprise to me. Our bond grew as the game went on, and I know I made a promise to Bree for the final 3 that I never intended to keep, but I believe in my heart of hearts that she didn't either. The same for Starr....neither of us had each other in the end plans. But that didn't minimalize the friedships we had.
Knox, you are a playah. I have mad respect for you and your style after this game. I understand you so much better, and I will be looking forward to reconnecting with you.
Liam, my apologies remain. You humbled me, and you made my game better for it.
Gloria, you are a beast. Know that no hatred went into anything I did, said, or acted towards you in the game. It was all game. I feared you from day one of the sacrifice until the moment you left.
Carly and Taylor, I wish I had been able to know you better. i believe you to be very lovable people.
Chad, you are awesome at this game. 13 is just a number. 12 is just a number. Keep up with the charm and skills and I know you will go far.
Zac, my boy, it was fun. We went through a lot, and I feel like i could have gone on and on about you in my torch walk, but I couldn't at the moment...not with game still going on. Thank you for being a stoic place of calm in the middle of a stormy game. You rock, my man!
Thank you for your time. Now I'm wondering if this is the last word I'll post in the Good vs Evil cannon. At least let my nerves and my heart settle down at any rate.
Dueces.
I'll try to be as raw and candid as I can possibly be here. This game has probably been one of my most memorable and challenge games, and I was pleasantly surprised by that. Not because I didn't think this series or Justin was capable of a really good game...it's because I have never ventured out into games where I wasn't recruited or didn't know the host in some capacity.
There were extreme highs and lows throughout this game, so I will remember it fondly and the people I met for years to come. Ironically enough, the lowest of the lows have come during this jury process when I should be proud of my accomplishments and excited. I suppose I am. But I feel I am more humiliated than anything and remembering why I have attempted to "retire" many times and haven't played in two years. Is my pride hurt? Sure. But not because I don't feel like I've received the accolades I deserved. Not because Liam thinks I've basically given this game away. Not because it's never been said, this is Mark's game to lose.
No. I see the raw emotions elicited from this game.
I came into this jury phase prepared to be as respectful, non-aggressive, and as humble as possible. Though, I don't know how humble one can be when their main goal is to say, "Look how great I was in this game!" On the same token, I remembered that those who don't come in fighting for there game aren't really respected in the end, so I realized very quickly I needed to switch gears.
I think what hurt me the most is I came in respecting my allies only to have been passive aggressively insulted on a number of cases, masked in eloquent speech and an upright manner, starting before the game when my torch walk was called into question. Really? Anybody who knows me, knows that the torch walk is my favorite, most respected part of the game, so I take pains to pay tribute, and to pay tribute honestly. But it was cried BS. And then I felt very reduced from a peer, from a mutual ally, to a puppy dog who's sole purpose in this game was to make my closest ally my object of strategic affection.
If I'm to be honest, I've never played a game with an ally so like minded to myself, so yes, it was refreshing and respect-worthy. But I feel I have been reduced over and over again, even to the point that when I did start defending my game, that I was accused of nastiness and mudslinging. The worst part is that I feel that many of you have been treated the same way. It hurts.
I don't have anything more to say about my game that hasn't been hashed out over and over again. I would like to have met more of you, but our schedules were different. Whereas I was on all day during the afternoon, most of you guys were on at night, so when we did cross paths, we only had but a few moments to skip pleasantries and dive into strategy. I didn't have the luxury of time. But I did have the luxury of my skills to get me here. I don't believe I promised any of you anything. Even you, Ben. We created a wonderful bond that have all the intentions of the world in maintaining, but I know we talked about not ever being able to be on the same page. So our voting for each other over and over again was inevitable.
Bree and Starr, you guys were such a pleasant surprise to me. Our bond grew as the game went on, and I know I made a promise to Bree for the final 3 that I never intended to keep, but I believe in my heart of hearts that she didn't either. The same for Starr....neither of us had each other in the end plans. But that didn't minimalize the friedships we had.
Knox, you are a playah. I have mad respect for you and your style after this game. I understand you so much better, and I will be looking forward to reconnecting with you.
Liam, my apologies remain. You humbled me, and you made my game better for it.
Gloria, you are a beast. Know that no hatred went into anything I did, said, or acted towards you in the game. It was all game. I feared you from day one of the sacrifice until the moment you left.
Carly and Taylor, I wish I had been able to know you better. i believe you to be very lovable people.
Chad, you are awesome at this game. 13 is just a number. 12 is just a number. Keep up with the charm and skills and I know you will go far.
Zac, my boy, it was fun. We went through a lot, and I feel like i could have gone on and on about you in my torch walk, but I couldn't at the moment...not with game still going on. Thank you for being a stoic place of calm in the middle of a stormy game. You rock, my man!
Thank you for your time. Now I'm wondering if this is the last word I'll post in the Good vs Evil cannon. At least let my nerves and my heart settle down at any rate.
Dueces.
